Have you ever felt like your life was spiraling out of control? Like you just wanted someone to stop the planet from spinning so you could get off? I have been through a lot of that recently. The only thing that kept me going was my faith that my world was being shaken up for a good reason.
I have been feeling for quite some time that I needed to move out of my apartment but I kept letting fear get in my way. And then an amazing opportunity came my way to share my time
between Calgary and Victoria. But here was the kicker. I had to learn to live with other people again…I have lived with no one but my dog and cat for the last 3 years. I put most of my stuff in storage, let some other stuff go, trusted that everything would work out as it should, and then did my best to let go of control. Many times in my Reiki practice I inform others to “trust in the process” but practice what I preach? The Gods must be crazy!
The last two months have been nuts. I spent a lot of time in fear, I lost my cat, came to the unflattering realization of just how unfocused I can be, and at 41 I have no idea where my life is going.
During this crazy period of my life one of the things that has helped keep me sane has been spending time in nature. I love being outdoors. Spring time in Victoria is amazing. Flowers are blooming everywhere, the breeze off the ocean is crisp and clean and the birds singing happily in the trees. If you ask me, I swear they are singing
just for me.
If I am having an especially stressful day
then I pull out “the big guns” and go for a walk amidst the trees. Their ancient knowledge and wisdom seems to whisper to me through the rustling of the leaves and even though I don’t understand what secrets these ancient Gate Keepers are trying to tell me, I feel a deep sense of peace as the forest envelops its musky, earthy warmth around me. The solid, stand still presence of the trees helps my mind to stop spinning and I realize all the crazy-ness I am going through right now is just temporary.
My life is still in transition. I don’t know where it is leading me, but I know that I am learning invaluable lessons. Recently the AA slogan “one day at a time” has been running through my mind, like a mantra and I am finding if I stop worrying about all the steps it may take to complete my journey and just focus on the step to take right now everything magically works out for my highest good. When that small quiet voice deep inside me says “go right” and I want to go left guess which direction I will take. All the advice I have given to others is suddenly being thrown in my face, and I have come to the hard realization that it really is time to “walk the walk” instead of just “talking the talk.”
At this moment my life is a clean slate and anything can happen. Opportunities abound if I just change my perspective from “everything I knew is gone” to “how lucky am I!? I get to re-invent a whole new me!”
I have more freedom now than I have had in 21 years. My son is grown, I am living with fabulous friends who will love and care for my dog when I need it, and my secondary job as a flight attendant allows me to travel and explore this incredible planet we live on. Yes, at this moment I have very few responsibilities and endless opportunities opening up to me.
You may be wondering why I am sharing all of this with you. The moral of this story is that if your life isn’t working as it is then try something different! Feel the fear and do it anyway!
Listen to that quiet voice inside. It is there to guide you. Spend some time in nature so you mind can become quiet and that quiet voice inside can be heard. Trust in that voice, it is the connection to your Soul and if you listen to it and follow its guidance your life will begin to unfold in a seamless and magical way.

This entry was posted on Sunday, May 11th, 2008 at 12:11 am